Nice studio shots – i mean, reallt amazing stuff here, but the product placement descriptions he has used makes me feel like he really shouldn’t have this sort of stuff (or talent). Wierd. Weird. I wonder what would happen if I did that in my personal space.

Let’s see:

The DVD collection was individually downloaded, burnt and labeled awkwardly in english by my landlord, the husband of the town’s radical party majoral candidate. The minimalist washing up fluid bottle was designed my SUDOMIL in Krusevac, Serbia, produced by Merima (1839). Tacky tourist mug was filled with coffee by Douglas Paulson and handed to me as I floated shivering in southern Czech waters. The bag of brooms is from my failed Rhizome commission, and my small grey and blue sculptures are based on the South Pacific island of Nauru. The dresser is actually a shelf turned on its side, produced by Simpo factory in Vranje, Serbia.

I realize I didn’t say enough how much I do love those studio shots. I spent a good twenty minutes looking at these photos, which my flippant “too much product placement” didn’t really capture.

Naked chicks via Rachelle Beaudoin.

And a question: when you meta-offend, are you actually offending anyone, or are they just (in addition to being guilty of whatever it is they are taking offense to that you said) not getting it?

In that spirit, can I just say for the record that there are lots of Man Artists that feminists would do better to hate than good ol’ painting-with-bored-naked-girls-whose-feet-really-hurt beecroft? I hear there’s this one macho guy with a napolean complex who thinks that since his dead sister was gay and he lived in Africa and he is sensitive without being a sissy that he can say lots of stuff that is ignorant… and his wife is like seriously an angel. Like seriously. No, really, you don’t understand. Neither does he. I mean, seriously.

You don’t understand. Really: you are missing out. My life is magic.

Where was I?

Oh yeah: guess what shelly i love you.

I mean:

Um.

Why are you doing this on a blog she doesn’t read? (uh plese don’t forward she wont like the other stuff)

Anyway.

yeah: lay off beecroft. go bug someone else. artists go to offensive lengths for their art. good artists often have to. or, daring ones, at least. if you only respect those who are assholes for good art, then what the fuck? meaning: its okay that Herzog is a condescending and dehumanizing manipulator but not beecroft? OK, so kanye is hardly Fitzcarraldo, but, my point is:

how can you tell if you’re a hack unless you try? really try?

or

we should give the untalented the same license as the talented, because talent is, well, maybe its hard to tell at first.

well, actually that is a side point, because I do not mean to say she is untalented. she does exactly what she says she does. when she photographs a black child, she is not trying to help the Sudanese, she is photographing a black child.

anyone who thinks beecroft is misguided is ignoring the fact that she, herself, said: she is painting. the people — those naked people — they are colors. that naked skin? yeah, it is a color.

so go get annoyed at someone who thinks their small minded offensive art is helping, deal?

To summarize: AHHHHH HEARTLESS MOTHER FUCKER GET FUCKING CRUNK IN THIS MOTHA FUCKIN BITCH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH UH UH UH UH UH UH.

Which is unfair.

HOW TO FLOAT IN A DISEMBODIED SPACE WITH A SHOVEL YOUR ONLY LINK TO EARTH: Chapter 6

1. Establish a vision
2. Generate ideas
3. Set priorities
4. Set goals and objectives
5. Develop work plan.

OMG. So the ZebraStraat Website Digital Art Biennial is so cutting-edge bleeding-envelope boundary-pushing future (futurrrr!) that The Earth has rings like Saturn and Princess Leah’s Mom’s hot body is like half cyber-space.

“In some cases, corporations have taken the sculpture for a logo.  They want to be identified with fine art sculpture because art uplifts the soul and that is good public relations…“

This is why irony can be slippery, because the straightforward do it so much better…

Also important: hot chicks with douchebags

But after twenty minutes, it is no longer a joke. And it starts to seem intentional. Like, they could not keep repeating this for this long unless they were trying to be annoying. Now, I know they like to piss people off, but to annoy is not the same as to piss off. Regardless, this just seemed… too much.

I finally decide I cannot take it. I am getting stressed out hearing this fucking thing over and fucking over again, so I am going to skip all sorts of pithy exchanges between chicago art people to a later section, where they will have a different loop going.

So I click forward, and it is still going!

So I click forward further, to the closing credits, an hour plus into the podcast. And It. Is. Still. Fucking. Going! Why on earth would BAD AT SPORTS repeat Amanda singing fifty cents for over an hour? I am hurt. I like them, but this is hurtful, and I am not sure if I can forgive this. It shows no respect. Worse, it is mean-spirited.

So I hit stop.

IT IS STILL FUCKING GOING. “Go Shorty! It’s your Birthday, gunna party like it’s your Birthday, 50 people singing 50 cents! Go! Go! Go! Go!”.

I know enough to realize that if stopping the file won’t stop it, that deleting it won’t either, but I delete the file anyway, because I hate it, and I want it gone.

STILL GOING. Empty the trash.

STILL GOING!

What the fuck, you bad at sports chicago JODI motherfuckers! How have you done this to me??!?! (Never mind why; I don’t even care anymore.)

And that’s when I realize. It’s not Amanda at all. It wasn’t bad at sports. They didn’t have any background loop.

It was this motherfucker. Now, to be fair, I had clicked that page, and I had forgotten it was there. So it was my fault. Not his.

But anyway, he brings up a realization I then had. I thought, what is it that I do not get about the art world that can explain why asking an indian architecture firm to design a house based on a song, or a crow jumping around telling you the time, is any good? (or even a good joke)

And the answer is, I don’t know. I may never know. I am not part of those people, as much as I would like to be. But that was the question. It was not the realization.

The realization was: this.

(are you ready?)

This

Stuff

Is

worse than Digital Media!

The only way it is not worse is if no thought was put into it. But if any was. If the artist wrote or thought anything about it, then it is worse than Digital Media.

And that is pretty amazing.